2012 has passed in the blink of an eye. It's the 31st of December, the year is ending, imminently, and guess what? I'm still way back at the beginning of December. I'm still Christmas shopping, I still need to get the rest of our Christmas decorations out of the loft and I'm definitely still planning this year's gift wrap style....how can it being new year's eve?
I have so much catching up to do, I'm so far behind that mentally I'm still in hospital about to push the greatest being on the planet out from inside my body.
2012 has been a year full of things to process and adjust to, so it makes sense (to me) that my mind should be way back in April still, being that April was the month that my life changed. For ever. Irrevocably. Beautifully. Naturally.
True to form 2012 has been another year where I have procrastinated the days away (to be fair this year is the first year that I have had a pretty good excuse). I have not achieved any of my new year's resolutions from Christmases past. I haven't managed to achieve the minimalist lifestyle I so crave for (with a baby on the way, what the heck was I thinking?) but I have gotten much better at hiding stuff.. nor have I crafted a single thing (shame on me). I have achieved a big fat zero on the resolution front.
BUT here's what I have achieved in 2012 -
I gave birth (naturally and at record speed, which came as a bit of a surprise to me) to a gorgeous creature. A baby boy. My baby boy.
I finally bagged the job I've always dreamed of; I became a mother. And what's more, I love it. Sounds like an obvious statement but while I always dreamed of having a family, I didn't really have any idea what it would be like. How I would cope, or if I would enjoy submitting my entire life to a child. But submit I have. Totally and completely. Knowingly and willingly. It seems this isn't a parenting style that everyone adopts. And it came as a bit of a surprise to me but when Chuck arrived my entire world perspective changed. It did a big fat upturn and landed up on its head. Suddenly 'my life' subsided and merged with Chuck's. He's the driving force in my life. Everything begins (and ends) with him. 'I' can wait. Or at least, my life has a new focus, a new meaning and a direction that it did not have before. I'm not sad to wave goodbye to the old me. I'm thrilled to say hello to the new me. The one with serious purpose in life and a new found understanding of love and humility (the who wears sweatpants constantly without shame), all thanks to my little boy.
I've had my eyes opened this year. I was blessed with a life full of love before Chuck arrived but now it's gone galactic. The amount of love that MB and I have for this little boy is unreal. It seeps from every pore and we (sickeningly) gush, daily.
He has shown me the true meaning of what it is to be and feel blessed and he has brought me closer to 'god', if only in my heart.
2012 has been a momentous year. We became a family. The little boy we had been waiting for arrived and brightened our every day. We are truly grateful for this and I for one, am super excited to see what 2013 has in store for our little family. I am cherishing every moment I have with this baby boy because 2013 will him him change quicker than I could have ever thought possible, into a little* boy. These moments are precious but I'm giddy to think about the things I'll be reliving come December 31st 2013. The list of 'firsts' will be huge and I can't wait to share!
To my boy - thank you for choosing us. Mama loves you. Always.
And to all of you out there; HAPPY NEW YEAR. May 2013 be all you can ever hope for and more.
*A word little often associated with my boy.